We had beautiful weather today! Still quite cool but very little rain. We rode along the coast for most of it, with spectacular views of the ocean and little New England looking like towns with weathered siding houses on steep hillsides. We are now tracing the route from the first coastal trip, but with different stops because of different mileage. Even though the weather was good, the psychological impact of the weeks ahead of us, and the paltry progress we are making into the 2000 miles, became overwhelming for Kristi. I told her this happens to everyone on his or her first big trip. Mike and I never admitted we were actually planning on going clear to New York until we had 1000 miles done. It is just too weighty of a task to confront all at once, so you have to protect yourself from the reality for a while. Kristi has to learn this technique or the trip will bury her in a mountain of despair. I think it's so hard to confront all at once because each day is so hard, and the thought of 4 weeks of that kind of physical difficulty no one can bear all at once. Today was bad because of all the steep (several 10%'ears) hills we had to do and she doesn't have the strength to climb these very fast. So, at 10 AM we had very few miles and she bonked mentally. There was lots of crying, and cursing her situation, and trying to think of a million ways to get out of it, even though she was the one who requested this trip. Matt and I assured her that it didn't matter how many miles we went, just so we kept at it. Such a lesson for life! The speed isn't important, only the direction!
This experience has got me thinking that many things we ask for, and want, not understanding the full import of our request, nor how truly difficult the experience will be. Marriage I'm sure qualifies for this scenario. However, just because we didn't really understand is no excuse to quit. In fact, we can't understand most important things until we have actually experienced them. This, I think is how it should be, because if we could understand we would be reluctant to take them on, and the growth that is essential would never occur. Life itself I believe is a macrocosm of this principle. I am certain we all wanted to come down from the presence of our Father (see Job 38:4,7). I am also certain that we really had no idea how difficult it would be at times, but we trusted our Father who did know, and told us it would be essential for our progression. Ironically, it would also bring us joy beyond our comprehension at the time because of the contrast with the opposition. Without the opposition, there is no joy. However, all this doesn't mean it's still not just plain hard to the very core. It is beyond what she thought she could do.. Kristi is experiencing this essential principle in all it's fury, and eventual joy. So, we will be settled for now with what she can do, and give her all of our love and support in the meantime. Actually it wasn't even a terrible day miles-wise, so all is good. Worry does not diminish tomorrows burdens, but it does rob today of it's strength. Later.
--Dad
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